Friday, September 2, 2011

The Monotony of Monogamy

Boy meets girl. Boy and girl fall in love. They get married and live happily ever after. As rare as the "ever after" is (1 in 3 marriages end in divorce), the "happily" might be ever rarer. Men have been yelling at televisions, changing oil, and retreating into "man caves" for centuries. Apparently, they have also been circulating the addage that once you get married, the sex stops and all the excitement drains from the relationship. In fact, many men don't deem it as a relationship, but rather an imprisonment. So...why get married?

Many people who choose a long-term relationship do so simply because of the monotony of the damn thing. You wake up to the SAME person everyday, do the SAME rituals for years on end...until the "sameness" becomes absolutely and terrifyingly suffocating. However, some people get married for the same reason. There are those who find comfort in the familiar; they WANT and NEED to know what's going to happen every day. These people are encountering the same crippling fear, but on the opposite end of the spectrum.

Finally, there are the anomolies...like me. I love coming home to a routine: walk in the door, set down my keys, take off my shoes...so on and so on. However, my ideal marriage where spontaneity is key. Let's go to the movies on a non-date night...let's go to a bar, have a drink, and just TALK. Communication, or lack thereof, ranks pretty high on the list of why marriages don't last. Even my husband putting down his distraction (whatever it may be at the time--I don't know--curing infant ducklings of the flu) and listening to me can be a form of "spontaneousness" in and of itself.

Contrary to what many men may thing, women are simple creatures. Be intimate. Protect and provide for us, despite our dismissal of your chivalry. For God's sake, compliment us without us fishing for it.

Give us a break from the boring.

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