Wednesday, December 24, 2008

A Few Things that Piss Me Off...

...most people would refer to these as "pet peeves" or what have you. I simply call them what they are. These are not in order of importance, just whatever pops into my head first.

1) Men. Don't get me wrong. I am not one of those women that are a die-hard, bra-burning-in-protest type of feminists, nor am I gay (Heaven forbid). Men, in general, annoy the hell out of me. The ones I have encountered are the worst types of people to ever walk the earth. I am one of those rare, endangered optimists when it comes to the types of folks I encounter. I believe that people are naturally good. However, the sons of bitches that I know all have some ulterior motive, a blatant motive, or just don't know a good friend/mate when they see one. Yes, I have my ways, I'm a bitch, yada yada. But I don't know any women that aren't at least 1/8 bitch. It's innate, unfortunately. Just like men are innately assholes. The type of guy I'm attracted to is the man's man: he's charming, funny, romantic, loving, fatherly...just a wonderful person to be around and look up to. However, most of these men KNOW they have these characteristics. Therefore, they are the worst type of assholes, because they are conceited, borderline arrogant. Then of course, there are the best friend men. In this case, the woman or the man has made it clear that there will never be anything between them, and they have come to a mutual acceptance. Of course, this guy still wants to have sex with this woman. THIS IS NOT OKAY. Sex is not this thing to do at half-time or just because we're in the same room. It's supposed to special, damnit. Yes, that usually means in a bed, guys.

2) People with no damn goals. Everyone knows you were the shit in high what. That was umpteen years ago. Let's move on and make lemonade. You may have made a mistake and had a kid or four, but you can still go to college and make something out of the shit that you've developed into. If it's just learning how to do that extra difficult color technique at cosmetology school, do it! Get off your dimpled ass and DO SOMETHING.

3) Reality shows. Clearly, this is a phenomenon that has gotten out of hand. It all started with Big Brother and Survivor, and evolved (I use that word as loosely as possible here) into shows like Flavor of Love and The Hills. Never has the acronym "wtf" been more appropriate. I don't understand them. If you give someone a scenario and say "Go do this," isn't that the OPPOSITE of reality?

4) People that portray that they are perfect. Now everyone that knows me is aware that I have no qualms about saying when I am wrong about anything. Whatever I don't know, I am going to ask someone that does. Unfortunately, there is that terrible, horrific subspecies of people that believes that they truly are perfect, or try to show everyone else that they are. I truly believe that this is a weak attempt to compensate for some childhood trauma where, as a post-adolescent, they feel the need to show everyone that they are in fact as good as, if not better, than everyone else. Ever heard "To err is human"? That goes for you too.

More coming soon...

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